Tag Archive: Humor

My Brain Scan


Always wanted to become a doctor.. But all that stress of studying, slogging, giving exams, waiting for the results.. I couldn’t take it anymore.. I wondered how my fragile brain could take so much of this humbug!! So, I decided to get my brain scanned.. And this is what I got!! Ah! Poor me!


6 Years

Happiness knew no bounds
When I got selected in PMT
With hopes of becoming a doctor
Started for a new life in a new city

New place, new faces
It was time to get acquainted
Cadaver, my first acquaintance
And I nearly fainted!

First Prof, mistaken as a soft breeze
Turned out to be a hurricane
Just three subjects
Which equally drove us insane!

Anatomy was all about artery, veins, nerve,
Organs, bones and muscle
No matter how much you learnt ’em
They seemed like a never ending puzzle.

Biochemistry was a mystery
I don’t understand it still
Complex chemical reactions never my cup of tea
It never was, it never will.

Physiology interested me a bit though
‘Cause of the logic that it followed
Nevertheless, it was too huge an entity
Too huge to be swallowed.

But I wont forget those beautiful days
New friendships blooming through
After-college parties and hangouts
And, of course, those midnight movies too.

Second Prof, infamously called
“The Honeymoon Period of MBBS”
Donno about honey and moon
But I was definitely a mess.

Pathology was all about diseases
And a lot of microscopic work
With half the microscopes not working properly
All I did was lurk in the murk.

Pharmacology was just medicines
Drug names and all
But I acquired dyslexia
When it came to chlorpheniramine and chloramphenicol!

Microbiology was anything but micro
So many of those invisible ones
What I can’t see, doesn’t exist for me
Enough said and done!

Forensic sounded interesting
I thought it’d be exciting
But all I learnt, that for proof in an MLC
You have to have it in writing!

But apart from studies there were better things
Like badminton, cricket and basketball
Not to forget, PULSE at AIIMS
And of course the College Carnival!

Playing the guitar, started a band
The first one in our college ever
We called ourselves the Raging Rockers
Most famous for our ‘Aadat’ endeavor.

With Third Prof Part One started clinical subjects
Call it the beginning of final lap
Even those who had barely started studying
It was time to start studying ASAP!

Preventive and Social Medicine
Even the name makes you shiver, u know?
Just programs, facts and definitions
I wonder who defined WHO!?

Otorhinolaryngology, though a never ending name
The syllabus was comparatively shorter, I’d say
‘Cause even I could complete
More than 2 chapters in a day!

Ophthalmology, was fine
It was about the eye
Although syllabus was tough
But not bad enough to make you die.

Friendship grew to different heights
Some romantic, and some as study partners
The lower ranks became obedient disciples
While the higher ranks attained the role of masters.

Third Prof Part Two, the worst nightmare
Very aptly named
Everybody lost their mind
And no one was to be blamed

The number of subjects, I’ve lost count
The syllabus for each was equally vast
But to complete the whole thing in just a year!
Impossible! Time went by devilishly fast!

For simplicity the subjects were divided into major and minor
As if THAT was gonna help
But after all ’twas the Grand Finale
And we felt one step closer to hell!

Medicine, surgery, pediatrics, obstetrics and gynecology,
Orthopedics, dermatology, anesthesia, psychiatry
Radiology, oncology, the list endless
If I missed any, I’m sorry!

But still amidst all the commotion
We found our moments of happiness
Those parties, movies, lecture bunks, those friendly hugs
And those soft gentle caress.

Internship was a breeze, it really was
Most spent their time studying in library
Also included frequent visits to the hospital
But that wasn’t too scary.

Entrance exams for higher studies
With all those weird looking MCQs
Those who got selected chose departments
According to the ranks they were let to choose.

Realization dawns, college is over
And friends leaving town
The final goodbyes, the last minute hugs
Strained smiles hiding tender frown.

Sitting in this empty room
Even my roommate’s now gone
Just books scattered everywhere
I feel miserably alone.

6 years ago it was a new city,
Starting of a new life
A lot has changed since that time
‘Twas a summer of 2005.

As mixed emotions of sadness and joy fill my heart
Everything that happened here will be more than just a cherished memory
Soon it’ll be time for even me to leave
To start again, a new life in a new city.

The Physiology Lecture

Threshold crossed

Jaws dropped

Eyes popped

But Dr Elliot continues teaching


Earth shakes

Buildings fall

People die

Dr Elliot goes on teaching


Chaos everywhere

People screaming

Dogs running away

Dr Elliot continues teaching CVS


Sun blackens

Sky darkens

Silence everywhere

But Dr Elliot won’t stop teaching


From heavens falls a beam of white light

Focuses on Dr Elliot making her bright

A voice sounds, “Enough……………!!!”

Dr Elliot continues, “signs and symptoms of myocardial infarction….”

I open my eyes and look around me.
I see Dr. John is teaching us coronary artery.
He speaks as if he’s a newsreader.
So monotonous, so irritating;
His periods are so frustrating.
Still he goes on, as if, he’s a newsreader.

I am sitting in the lecture hall,
Thinking of how I tolerate him at all.
But Dr. John won’t stop blabbering.
I just woke up; was in my dreams,
Thinking of cute girls and ice-creams.
But Dr. John won’t stop blabbering.

He’s a disastrous teacher
Looks to me a newly discovered creature.
But Dr. John goes on teaching.
Disgusting to look
He teaches everything from the book,
And I call this as “cheating”.

Dr. John teaches us Anatomy.
He throws concepts like a Frisbee.
But I don’t understand him at all.
I look around to see most of my batch-mates sleeping,
And most of them are still weeping.
But Dr. John won’t stop torturing us all.

The ceiling fan rotates above me,
The tube-lights glowing brightly
But I am still sleeping.
Dr. John still continues teaching us heart.
I smell it, I can hear him fart!
But that won’t stop me from sleeping!!

As the lecture comes to an end,
Every sadness and frustration comes to an end.
I can feel the happiness within.
As Dr. John leaves the hall with added grace,
There’s happiness on every single face.
Truly, without Dr. John world is a better place to live in

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